Belong

Belong (Verb)
1. Be rightfully put into a particular position or class. 2. Fit or be acceptable in a particular place or situation

It will be great if one could return to the tradition of making a fuss about nothing. I call it improvisation writing. A writing process wherein you let the words flow spontaneously by themselves while you guide flow minimally a sort of automatic writing if you will. Our anchor in this jot is the word ‘belong’, a verb.

Let’s move. One’s brain is not wired like a scientific calculator – A behemoth during my scholastic days way yonder in Phelendaba. I loved mathematics but alas my brain could not fathom the intricacies of the magical trigonometry nor geometry. As for the fractions I always imagined that they were like mean machines caressing the innards lines of the A4 hard cover college exercise book reeking confusion in my already delicate brain but alas I must confess that I loved algebra for for 1 me there was a mysterious aura that the letter x carried. You were the investigator trying to make sense what is it that made x so alluring. What it stood for. So a particular number, after a laborious outing on your part, you were to learn, was x. I know this is jargon especially for those who don’t give a whiffie whaff about math. That particular number or x belonged to the entire problem hitherto presented to the mathematical investigator – you. And should you be amongst the enlighten ones who cracked it it gave you a joyous release more glorious than the debut coital release.

Although I had planned to pursue history and geography in the latter part of my scholastic years ‘fate’ decided that yours truly would take on the sciences and I found myself continue to struggle with math until I ceremoniously exited high school even after a stint at an attempt to upgrade my math it was affirmed by the gods of calculations themselves that math was not for me. During those gritting grinding years at David Helen Peta High School I found solace in the languages especially the literature sections. But then there were a bunch of ouens who did well in math and science and I found myself gravitating towards them. Besides they enjoyed making drawings. I come to think of it this was the only thing that I happen to excel at and this won me a seat in their midst and a pinch of admiration as well. You can always replace the word ‘seat’ with ‘respect’ in the previous paragraph.

It felt good to know that I too could contribute some panache, some sophistication and mystery to a highly regarded outfit. Of course with the exception of one gent we were all slaap tigers in the ladies department. So as far as that section of the story is concerned we were in the Kalahari. Looking back it is easier to see that should I have not excelled in making comics and illustrations of some cooked up heroes or cyborgs that skeem would not have welcomed me in their midst from the get. I would’ve been an outsider looking in. Or perhaps I would’ve belonged to another bunch that could’ve perhaps been caught up in the antics of dodging school. Wouldn’t you agree that belonging is relative? I mean by your announcement that you belong to that group you renounce (like a silence ninja double kick in the thicket of darkness) the other group. You take a position, you assert yourself. There is no need to apologize for that behavior for by apologizing you’ll rub it in, deeply, struesgod.
Yes I do acknowledge the default position, place or situation forced down our throats by fate. In a nyakanyaka-mathatha situation wherein you don’t get to choose your birth country, race, sex even your parents one may find solace in the thought that if all is not well to your liking it is worthwhile to crawl towards the fanciful. An eastern sage, I read elsewhere, says everything that exists is cooked up in the mind. I am not so sure about mathematical problems though. However I hold dearly to the thought that we are animals of ‘belonging’ we want to be a part of a certain group or something, that’s our titillation. And by default we are a result of a particular ‘belong’ even if not of our choosing. All else from there onwards is negotiated.

Notes
1. Yes the second ‘for’ belongs in this line, it is not a typing error. It aids emphasis especially in a long deliberately strewn sentence. You will encounter a few such as this one as you read on. Witness the last line of paragraph two.

Late winter

5 August
© mmutle arthur kgokong 2014

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